Worst: The One True Way

So we can now add trading to evolution on the grand list of Pokemon game mechanics which are secretly bad. Great.

The Gentleman gives a pretty corny speech about friends trading with friends, creating a web of friendship that will envelop the globe, laying it to waste when the giant spiders hatch, eternally hungry for human flesh. The implication is that he’s kind of subtly cajoling Ash into giving him the Butterfree that kicked his Raticate’s ass but the speech about trading is pretty much the same one Nintendo gives so I’m not sure what to think.

Extra worst: Ash putting a lot of effort into raising Butterfree? Hahaha, no.

Best: Everybody Should Trade, Let’s Start Trading

He’s talking about his sperm, everybody. I just thought you should know.

Best: The Trade Machine

Wow, talk about game mechanics that really didn’t need to be brought over.

Instead of, you know, just swapping Poké Balls with each other, Ash and the Gentlemen apparently have to use this machine. Perhaps to brainwash the Pokémon inside into accepting their new masters. The machine works using the buttons of a cassette player. Which is a make-up I’d expect to see on the TARDIS but not so much for this. I guess it’s strange that I could accept the record button being used to traverse the time vortex and not to trade Pokémon but here we are.

Worst: I Miss My Butterfree

You never use it and you’re going to give it away in five episodes. Enough with the melancholy, Ash. Ash talks about how he traded away his beautiful, pure Butterfree because the other guy liked trading so much and made him feel that he couldn’t refuse without being a jerk. Is this a sex thing? Are we learning to resist advances? Is this what I’m watching? I hope not.

Meanwhile, a few feet down from Ash and Misty, Weevil Underwood is throwing away Yugi’s Exodia cards.

Best: Giovanni as Ozymandias

“Increase stock in Celadon City casino. Lessen focus on taking over Kanto, Johto games are coming out soon. Blow up Viridian City Pokémon Center 13 episodes ago.”

  1. Rando says:

    i didn’t know this was the first episode either – interesting move, if most likely unnecessary.

    i’m interested to know how ‘nintendo’s puritanical nature’ affected the original translation of the next episode. as i recall, brock had once heard ‘a story about a man called noah’ that inspires them to send pidgeotto to look for land. there’s your homework for next week.

    • David says:

      Oh, that’s definitely getting one of my paragraphs where I just talk about Japanese culture and make no jokes and everyone skips to the next Best/Worst.

  2. Delsaber says:

    I totally forgot that Team Rocket had a vaguely-imposing Shadowy Figure of their very own. I wonder where he places in the greater pantheon of Shadowy Figures; above Inspector Gadget’s Claw and Star Trek’s “Future Guy”, but below the WWE “Board of Directors”?

    Southern Gentleman = the current head of the Maximillian Knights. Fred got it on with someone, obviously.

    Also, your choice of image for Worst: I Miss My Butterfree can be totally misinterpreted. By me, anyway. I guess they don’t mind Pikachu watching.

  3. Luke says:

    Oh man, I was really beginning to enjoy reading these and it ends so abruptly. And with that comment promising more soon almost a month old with nothing new, is this the end of this? I sure hope not

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