Worst: Ash is Vasco de Gama

So, the party went north through Route 24, met Bill and are now at Vermilion City? Did they just bloody circumnavigate the Pokémon world, north to south? What’s that about?

Okay, maybe they did a complete u-turn at Bill’s Lighthouse and Costume Shop and then wandered aimlessly for weeks before staggering into Vermilion City but that seems unlikely. But I guess it would explain why they look so disheveled.

Best: Brock’s glistening eye lids

What is that? Stop doing it! I feel like I’m being sucked in. So this is how Brock feeds on human souls.

Best: Meanwhile, at the Legion of Doom Headquarters…

I’m not sure who on the anime staff decided that the game Pokémon centers were boring and instead needed to be colossal architectural fever-dreams but they are my new favourite person ever.

I keep expecting them to cut inside and show Nurse Joy applying an ice-pack to Captain Cold while Solomon Grundy shuffles around wearing one of those paper gowns with his ass hanging out.

Best: All in the Family 1998

Vermilion Joy says the one in Pewter City is her first cousin, and the one in Viridian City is her second cousin. Fair enough, but in the second episode the Nurse Joy in Viridian City called the one in Pewter City her sister. So how does that work without a whole lot of inbreeding allowing each of the Nurses Joy to essentially pick whatever familial title they prefer from a list?

Seeing as we never see a Nurse John perhaps the Nurses are like the Gerudo from Legend of Zelda and just find like one man ever once in a while to run around impregnating them all. I would like to formally submit my application at this time and would like all testimony from partners both current and past to be stricken from the record.

Worst: Our Pride is On the Line

Yeah, Misty, it sure would suck if Ash lost to the Vermilion gym leader after getting freebie badges from you and Brock. Good thing he didn’t lose horribly to some nobody with a Sandshrew last time the Cerulean City Aquarium and Sushi Bar’s honour was on the line.

Misty needs to stop mocking Ash for his free badges, like she and Brock weren’t responsible for them or anything, and just get back to asking where her new bike is and why isn’t it here right now.

  1. Delsaber says:

    This might be the only episode of the series that I can still remember with any clarity, other than fleeting moments from that Pokémon Island thing, or the one with the hidden village of Pikachus. Pikachu. Pikachii. Pikachese. Whatever.

  2. Rando says:

    congratulations on a successful breaking down of my favorite episode! i just think this one’s fantastic, what with the brief moments of foreshadowing, the slight complexity given to team rocket, and the introduction of ideas/morals other than just ‘don’t be a jerk, pokemon are our friends, blah blah’. that being said, i’ve always picked out the same ridiculous parts as you have – like after pikachu loses the first battle and is moping in the hospital, they’re all like ‘ooh it’s really upset that it didn’t have what it takes’ when it was probably thinking ‘why the FUCK would you make me do that?’

    american tv would be better if characters sporadically shouted obscenities in other languages.

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