Best: Reduce, Reuse, Recycle

It’s nice to see Team Rocket get some more use out of that vacuum they stole back in Episode 7.

Team Rocket show up with [OBJECT] that uses [OBJECT 2] to snatch Pokémon. Luckily, Ash uses [POKéMON] which uses [MOVE] which causes the [OBJECT] to explode or fly away, causing Team Rocket to [END LINE].

Object: a giant baseball stadium
Object 2: a giant vacuum
Pokemon: Pidgeotto
Move: Gust
End Line: blast off again, twinkle.

Best: Ash is Dumb, But in a Good Way

Melanie is all “hai ash wouldn’t bulbasaur be cool in your party wink wink” and Ash just goes “yeah he would. ok bye.”

I know I give Ash a hard time but that’s because he’s the main character and so is more responsible for the enjoyment levels of the show than anyone else. In this case, his complete lack of guile makes him charming, rather than a moron. He’s simply not cynical enough to spot the opportunity to get a Bulbasaur until Melanie just straight up tells him to take the damn thing.

Worst: My Bulba Ain’t Soaring

Melanie says that the village is too small for Bulbasaur’s bulb to grow and that’s why he needs to leave. That’s why by episode 225, when he’s sent back to Professor Oak for no real reason, his bulb is so much bigger from all his experiences and no I’m making that up, it didn’t change size at all.

Melanie should just tell the truth: “Bulbasaur is an asshole, I don’t want to deal with him and he’s not even sick so what the hell is he doing here anyway?”

Best: Welfare Leeches

The excuses pile up as Melanie also explains that Bulbasaur is too awesome at his job. Things are too safe, so the Pokémon don’t want to leave, even when they’re recovered.

Seeing as my Battle Royale reference last week was a hit: My solution? Danger zones. Also, if Melanie was in Battle Royale, she’d be one of those girls who uses the megaphone to propose a truce, getting her and her friend killed.

If you’re wondering why so many bests and worsts are spilling out of what is one scene between Ash and Melanie, it’s because this scene is long. It’s probably the longest, most circular and repetitive discussion since Episode 8, when A.J. and Ash spent 20 minutes debating Pokémon emancipation in a manner similar to the Lincoln-Douglas debates.

Worst: Battle With Bulbasaur

Pidgeotto. Use Pidgeotto. Pidgeotto’s a Flying/Normal type, Bulbasaur is a Grass/Poison type. So just pick Pidgeot– oh, you’re going with Pikachu? Yeah, that’s cool, whatever. Do what you want, man.

The battle that follows is one of those really lazy ones that the cartoon seems to cram in whenever they feel there has been too much talking in an episode: Tackle, tackle, vine whip, thundershock, Poké Ball, battle over. It’s barely worth the effort in animating it. They could have literally cut to the next scene and had Ash gloat about catching Bulbasaur and nothing of value would have been lost.

  1. Rando says:

    was that a Fievel reference!? <3

    you know, i honestly never realized there was a 10-character name limit (though that totally makes sense). with all the weird-ass names, i just assumed that somewhere along the line, someone through Feraligatr was clever.

    i'm starting to get the impression that you somehow dislike tracey sketchit :\

    • David says:

      It was either going to be Fievel or Maus and I went with the slightly cheerier option.

      I haven’t watched the Orange Island stuff in years so I’m actually wondering if after 10 or so years my opinion on Tracey Sketchit will have changed. We’ll find out in about a year and a half.

  2. Flare says:

    “Look, the thing is, no matter what happens after the fact, almost no Pokémon wants to be captured. That’s why you beat them up until they curl up in a fetal position and then steal them away from their lives, friends and family in the wild.” = The cold, hard truth about Pokemon.

    • David says:

      There’s only room for one shitty website around here, so I’ve removed all the spam links forcing you suckers to remain here for all eternity.

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